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Michael Nardine

As should be made obvious by the accompanying photo, Mike Nardine (aka Cheap Mike) is plain vanilla and old as dirt. He has been writing since before the invention of the electric typewriter. His first computer was a 1kb Sinclair; his love-affair with computers began with a Kaypro. He has sold short stories to women’s magazines and has published several books, which are available in Amazon’s Kindle Store. Mr. Nardine has also written a whole slug of book reviews, play reviews, news articles, and consumer-tech stuff for various ezines and The Reader Weekly of Duluth, Minnesota. He presently lives in Rochester, Minnesota with his wife of many years and a fifteen-year-old Jack Russel Terrier named Chloe. Still writing as he circles the drain, he also sells domains and web hosting at CheapMikes.com. Email Mr. Nardine at michaelnardine@secretlaboratory.org.

Web Site: http://www.cheapmikes.com


LOOKING FOR DOMAIN SX?

January 6, 2013
LOOKING FOR DOMAIN SX?

Are you looking for SX in all the wrong places? Can’t afford Sex-Dot-Com…or Sex-Dot-Anything for that matter? Well there is new hope for those of us who wish to retire early on our earnings as Internet porn purveyors. No need now to pay ten million plus for a Dot Com that signals salaciousness like...
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Librarians or Keepers of the Kindle

June 23, 2012
Librarians or Keepers of the Kindle

For many of us the public library lost its soul long before the coming of the Kindle. Libraries became multi-media, three-ring circuses: audio-visual tapes in one ring, computer centers in another, and books in the gradually-shrinking third. They had little choice, of course, as the disbursers of the public purse demanded entertainment for the...
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The Ipad Fragile? Don’t You Believe IT

May 30, 2012
The Ipad Fragile? Don’t You Believe IT

It isn’t my job here at the Secret Lab to tout products. But all the online nonsense about the Fragile Ipad got to me and I had to tell my story… This afternoon my five-year-old grandson ran past me with my first Ipad in hand. The Targus case was open and flopping in the...
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Want To Run For Office? Secure Your Domain Name First!

May 24, 2012
Want To Run For Office? Secure Your Domain Name First!

Ready to run for public office?  If you haven’t registered your campaign domain name yet you might want to get that done first.  Even more important, have you registered your full-name domain yet?  That’s “yourfullname.com!”   ”JohnJones.com” or “AlbertSmith.Com,”  for example.  A politician’s name is his brand name and if you don’t have that brand...
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Hosting Bandwidth For My Small Business Site–How Much Do I Need?

May 18, 2012
Hosting Bandwidth For My Small Business Site–How Much Do I Need?

If you ask a techie type the question posed by the title, you might get an more of an answer than you really need. You see, the question is a bit of a riddle, like the old “How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?” Of course...
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CHEAP MIKE TOURS LONDON ENGLAND

April 10, 2012
CHEAP MIKE TOURS LONDON ENGLAND

Friday, March 30, 2012 Cheap Mike Tours London, England! Pay-per-click hasn’t been working that well lately for Cheap Mike. Since Mike always tries to do his best by the economy and spend money, he turned to look for a new advertising source. His good friend AN-G, the Vietnamese entrepreneur, suggested using Fiverr.com For those...
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Writing A Book? Don’t Forget Your Website!

March 10, 2012
Writing A Book? Don’t Forget Your Website!

Writing A Book? Don’t Forget Your Website! Writing a book or thinking about writing one? Already have one published or online? Then think seriously about getting yourself a domain name and a website. There is no better way of bringing your name and your book some great cheap publicity. The big guys are doing...
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I Just Bought A Domain Name … Now What Do I Do With It?

February 26, 2012
I Just Bought A Domain Name … Now What Do I Do With It?

As you can probably guess by the title, this article isn’t for those of you that already know what you’re going to do with your new web address. Maybe you intend to put a web site on it; maybe you were only looking for a personalized email address; in any case, you bought it...
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The Kindle Improves On War and Peace!

February 24, 2012
The Kindle Improves On War and Peace!

The Kindle Improves On War and Peace! Makes it easier and more fun to read.  I bought the book shown in the image above forty years ago.  It weights almost three pounds.  That’s a light-weight as paper copies of War and Peace go; five or six pounds would be more like it.  I was...
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Domain Co: The Once And Future Domain King?

February 4, 2012
Domain Co: The Once And Future Domain King?

Centuries before Wellington and Churchill, Great Britain was saved from the barbarians by King Arthur.  Legend has it that when England is once again in desperate trouble, King Arthur will return.  His tombstone is said to read, “Here lies Arthur, formerly king, and king to be.”  Twentieth Century author T.H. White modernized the quote...
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Review of: The Uncanny Valley: Tales From A Lost Town

January 29, 2012
Review of: The Uncanny Valley: Tales From A Lost Town

The Uncanny Valley: Tales From A Lost Town by Gregory Miller Illustrated by Randall York StoneGarden.Net Publishers 2011 Reviewed by Mike Nardine (“Gregory Miller is a fresh new talent with a great future.” –Ray Bradbury) As all of us know, a valley is a low point on the topography usually bisected by a river...
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An SEO Myth: The Dot-Com Advantage!

January 28, 2012
An SEO Myth: The Dot-Com Advantage!

SEO, for those of you who might care but don’t know, is the acronym for “Search Engine Optimization.”  SEO matters because it can mean the difference between a website appearing on page one of a search engine results page (like Google, Yahoo, etc.), or page 500. Since most searchers quit looking for sites after page...
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No More Excuses: Publish Your Book!

January 25, 2012
No More Excuses: Publish Your Book!

Authors, rejoice!  You have nothing to lose but your unpublished manuscripts! Ebooks, Ereaders and Epublishing are the great levelers. You got the same 100% chance of getting published as Stephen King. You no longer have to send your book to half-a-hundred publishers hoping for an acceptance before you finally bite the bullet and spend...
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Read eBooks, meet chicks!

January 24, 2012
Read eBooks, meet chicks!

Hey Guys, Want To Meet New Chicks? Forget The Macho Stuff! Carry an Ereader! An attractive young woman actually initiated a conversation with me today at our local Dunn Bros. coffee shop!  She was a college student, I think, studying for a test.  If this happens to you all the time, then you’re probably...
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Domain IT–A Domain Hacker Delight

January 23, 2012
Domain IT–A Domain Hacker Delight

Fear not, gentle reader, you are not about to enter into the dark, criminal world of the “hacker!”  Using the knowledge you accrue here will not bring Interpol or the FBI to your door. “Domain hacks” are neither illegal nor immoral; they are, in fact, creative, clever, and well-received by most netizens–excluding, of course,...
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VPN, The Great Wall, And The More Things Change….

January 23, 2012
VPN, The Great Wall, And The More Things Change….

“…The more they stay the same.” Or so says the French Proverb (“Plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose”). Don’t laugh; it’s all true: “history would be more interesting if it were not so repetitious.” (I have no idea where that last quotation comes from, but I love it!) Watching the interaction—or lack...
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EDITOR’S COLUMN

1
"I wanted my own column in the sidebar ... but now I don't know what to do with it."

"But sure you do! You write in it! That is what most people who claim the moniker of writer would likely do."

"But what do I write?"

"The resolution to that parable, my friend, lies upon the path that you must seek."

"Who are you?! And where did you come from?!"

"I am...the part of you that is, and will be, in all that we are..."

Hello Lab!

The voices are becoming louder and the cries ever more commanding. I hear them and I am working the best I can to whip myself into some kind of respectable shape and take back my claim to authorship.

So, I have been signaled to action from the Lab's headquarters. There has been much waking from many deep slumbers and now the drowsiness is fading and the challenges of the day are dutifully materializing before my conscience in their daily summons to contest.

No fear, Secret Laboratory! Power down the Bat Beacon, John.

John. John? Wherefore art thou? Come quickly and hear ye: The Lab is scheduled to receive a bright and refreshing burst of content! I have plans for at least one new category: Network Security

In the recent weeks I have become familiar with penetration testing software such as Backtrack and Kali Linux. These are Linux based Operating Systems that are used by network security professionals for white hat constructive hacking; and network exploiting operators for black hat destructive hacking. Writers of Secret Laboratory are free to show interest in this new category if you so choose. I will be producing content regarding how to crack WEP/WPA/WPA2 wireless encryption and how to protect yourself from such attacks, for starters. It only gets interesting from there.

For those of you interested in preparing yourself for this new world of fun and adventure, I recommend you go ahead and get the tools: Kali Linux
It can be downloaded at - http://www.kali.org/downloads/

The Secret Laboratory is in the grueling process of churning old gears and installing new ones to bring life into our world of journalistic comedy and tragedy. Sink or swim, this boat is headed out to sea.

I'm headed off to write a column now that the voices in my head have stopped...

But I can't seem to find John.

John?

Oh shit. Really? He's in the bathroom? Again? Geez, I'm glad I didn't have whatever he did. Must have been the pills. I'm glad I only had the purple ones...

"Hey John! Can you reach the mini fridge from in there? I think I need another beer!"

—Terencio Safford
Editor, Secret Laboratory
terencio@secretlaboratory.org

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EDITORIAL STAFF

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Publisher & Editor-in-Chief
John T. Schmitz

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Managing Editor
Terencio Safford

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Executive Editor
RJ Wattenhofer

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DEPARTMENTS

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Sports
Eric Melch, Senior Editor
Brandon J. Rompa, Reporter

National Affairs
Shane Lindemoen, Senior Editor
Tom Bullington, Correspondent

Women’s Affairs
Liliana Grace, Editor

Arts & Entertainment
Samantha Veldhouse, Editor
Tatiana, Correspondent

Home & Health
Michele Peterson-Rufener, Editor

Technology
Michael Nardine, Editor

Gaming
Josh Flaherty, Editor

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BUREAUS & DIVISIONS

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Contributing Editors
Debra A. Carroll
Patti Lynn Henry
Shar Martinez
Bob Newland

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West Coast Correspondents
Robert Martin, KE6YDO
Richard Martin, KE6RJI

Music & Film Correspondents
Lauren R. Thomas
Nicole Thomas

Love & Sex Expert
Nick Tschida

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Reporters
Harvey Crumb
Otto Kroona

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ABOUT US

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Secret Laboratory is an online entertainment magazine for Music, News, & Global Affairs; it is published in the USA by Maple Hills Press.

Secret Laboratory is a progressive publication that supports human rights and building a better future for mankind. We specialize in humor, satire, news analysis, and support indie authors. Maple Hills Press, a non-traditional publishing imprint, believes that all talented writers should have a platform for their work, whether it be on the Internet, in the eBook market, or in print.

We welcome your comments, questions, and suggestions; we also encourage writers to submit their work and for bloggers to re-publish their columns here. If you're interested in joining our team, please visit our Submissions Page.

Correspondence may be directed to:
editor@secretlaboratory.org

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